A Day in the Life of Me

Love bombing can feel like the start of a fairytale, but isn’t kindness—it’s a strategy. Abusers use it to:

1. To Fast-Track Emotional Dependence

Abusers use love bombing to create a fast, intense emotional connection. This emotional “high” makes it easier for them to:

• Get close to you quickly
• Bypass natural boundaries
• Make you feel “chosen” or special

“We’re meant to be. I’ve never felt this way before.”
When someone says this too soon, it’s not about love—it’s about control disguised as intensity.

2. To Lower Your Defenses

When you’re being showered with praise, affection, and attention, it’s natural to let your guard down. Abusers know this—and use it to:

• Gain your trust fast
• Discourage you from questioning red flags
• Make you more willing to forgive early inconsistencies

“You can trust me. I’d never hurt you.”
Meanwhile, they’re building a setup that makes you easier to manipulate later on.

3. To Create Emotional Confusion

The drastic shift—from intense affection to sudden coldness or criticism—is not random. It’s a deliberate part of the abuse cycle:

• You start to crave the “good times”
• You blame yourself when the affection disappears
• You try harder to please them to get it back

This creates a trauma bond, where you become emotionally attached to someone who is actively harming you.

4. To Isolate You

Love bombers often want your time, attention, and energy—all of it. In the beginning, it might sound romantic:

• “I just want to be with you all the time.”
• “You don’t need anyone else—just me.”

But over time, this turns into isolation. Friends and family may fade out of your life, not because you wanted them gone—but because the abuser made it feel “right” to choose them over everyone else.

5. To Make You Question Reality Later

Once the abusive behavior starts, survivors often think:

• “But they were so loving at first…”
• “I must be doing something wrong.”

This is one of the most damaging parts of love bombing—it causes you to question your own judgment. You remember how good things seemed, and you wonder if you’re overreacting. This self-doubt keeps you stuck.

Think of it as bait. Once you’re “in,” the compliments fade—and control, guilt, or manipulation often begins.

Remember:

If someone made you feel like the center of the universe—only to tear you down or control you later—it wasn’t love. It was abuse, masked as romance.

You’re not naïve for falling for it. Love bombing is designed to disarm even the most grounded, thoughtful people. You trusted. They manipulated. That’s on them—not you.